A Finer Appreciation
by Jerry Emmers

I heard about Orgasmic Meditation from an ex-girlfriend who had done a lot of different types of meditation practices over the years. One of my main goals for doing the practice was to get even more comfortable with women on a number of different levels. I can say that, although Orgasmic Meditation wasn’t the only practice I engaged in to reach that comfort level, it strongly influenced my relationships with women after about only 20 OM sessions.

I really enjoyed OMing with a couple of the women I had multiple sessions with. I think what I enjoyed most of all were the sharing frames step afterward. It was very helpful and brought in such a deep human connection to the practice. If it had been just, “Oh, thank you, bye!” that would have been terrible for me. I think learning what people gained from the practice and hearing why they were doing it was almost more important than the practice itself for me. I also really enjoyed the container and all the steps we had to take to make the experience safe. There was a real sense of caring and learning together.

The experience gave me a finer appreciation for how different women are. I had a number of realizations about how to talk with a partner—that it’s important to directly ask for what you want. I can ask a strokee “Would you like me to stroke softer? or faster? or slower?” she can answer with “Yes” or “No” and totally stay mentally and emotionally where she is. But if I ask, “What do you want next”? then she has to go into the mental realm and leave being with the current moment. That’s why it’s against the container. So, that was really helpful. One of the other things I learned was how powerful a simple “Thank you,” is. Since learning to OM, I've learned to express thanks in general, authentically giving simple appreciation to people.

Overall, I think the piece that was most interesting for me is that Orgasmic Meditation is intimate and yet not sex. The dual nature of the practice is intriguing. I got a lot out of it and am glad that I practiced it for a time.