I divorced in 2012 after a 20-plus year relationship with a more conservative person. Afterward, I reverted back to my curious, more adventurous self. I’d heard of Orgasmic Meditation, but it wasn’t until I heard a particularly good podcast about it that I decided to learn to OM.
My first OM struck me as unbelievable. I didn’t think women would be open to, and even interested in, a practice that involved taking off their pants. What was even more unbelievable was that, when my OM partner took off her pants, I didn’t feel anything sexual. OM took my full attention. It felt very human. It was the opposite of pornography, the opposite of sexual desire. I didn’t know the terminology then, but I felt it: this thing has intimate potential.
With women, my standard conversation used to be: “What do you do? This is what I do,” “Where did you go? This is where I went.” Now I’m curious how they feel, what moves them, the experiences they’ve had. It’s an amazing experience when a woman meets that attention and opens to share more of herself, like a time-release movie of a flower blooming.
I’ve always had a reasonable level of success with women, but our interactions had a mechanistic quality to them. I didn’t know how to change it or what to change it to. Once I started OMing, I realized that I had only been looking at women as a potential opportunity for sex. If I met a woman, my attention wasn’t really on her, how she felt, or how I felt around her. The more I OMed, I could feel my mind open to see all of the complexity of the human being, the whole woman in front of me.
Once I had a dedicated OM practice, it became a part of who I was. So, when I recently met someone new, OM became part of our relationship. A relationship with the nutrient of an OM practice is so regenerative. There’s an OM channel between us at a subtle level, and when we OM it spikes up another level of intensity, and that charge stays there. That post-OM groove is a silky, great feeling to have with your woman.
My partner has a busy job with lots of travelling. We’ve realized that the best time for us to OM is when she first comes into the house, before the rest of what we do takes over. Her phone is ringing, the beeps are going, but in literally 15 minutes I’m grounding with her. I can feel her frequency change and all the static from the outside world dissipates away. Within a couple of minutes, she’s right there, at the tip of my finger, and that’s magical.